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I had read a column Phyllis wrote about Mother’s Day 1979 for The New York Times. On that day, at six in the morning, her daughter woke her to say that Theroux, then seven, wasn’t in his bed.“The youngest is a born rider of the rails,” Phyllis writes.“He thinks up reasons to run away, just for the thrill of it.” She ran downstairs and found no sign of him.“I went to the telephone, dialed the police, and lived out my worst fear—I put in a missing-child report.” As officers made their way over, Phyllis thought to check one more place: the community garden where she kept a plot. As she drove there, she spotted her son, barefoot, in his pajamas. She ushered him into My Spirit Animal is A Grumpy Cow Who Slaps Annoying People Shirt the car and demanded to know why he’d left.“‘Because,’ he sobbed,‘I woke up and remembered it was Mother’s Day and I didn’t have a present. And I thought maybe I could find some flowers to pick. But when I got to Oregon Avenue, I remembered I wasn’t allowed to cross it by myself.’ ” She forgave him and said they should get home to tell the police. Suddenly Theroux stopped sulking.“His face took on an intensely interested expression,” Phyllis writes.“The tragedy of Mother’s Day had been supplanted by a more interesting thought line.”

Mother’s Day 2020 came at the height of the pandemic, shortly after Phyllis’s husband died.“It had been such a tough year for her, and I wanted to tell her how much I loved her,” Theroux says.“Not just‘Hey, Mom, Happy Mother’s Day. I love you.’ I really wanted to impress on her how valuable she is to me. I wanted to express in a completely unfettered way how much I loved her.” At one point, he explained that two months in quarantine had made him feel as if he’d lost a year of his life.“She was like,‘My Spirit Animal is A Grumpy Cow Who Slaps Annoying People Shirt You feel like you’ve lost a year? I don’t know how many more of these years I have left,’ ” he says.“That scared the s*** out of me. My Spirit Animal is A Grumpy Cow Who Slaps Annoying People Shirt  my career, what I want to accomplish, my legacy, all that. It made me think, Oh my God, I’ve got to pay more attention to the things that are important.” Family. Friends. Love.“I want partnership,” he says.“Like everybody.”

Photographs by Mark Seliger. Styling by Nick Sullivan. Casting by Randi Peck.

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